January 2009

January 13, 2009 · 3 comments

Reasons Why My Life Is Not An Episode of 24

The following takes place between 9am and 10am. All events occur in real time. Drew sits at his desk. He’s just arrived to work late again, and realizes there is a ton to do. So he drags out removing his laptop from his bag, possibly even taking one minute and fifty eight seconds to plug ...

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January 12, 2009 · 2 comments

Please Look In The Mirror and Punch Yourself In The Face (your actual face, not the mirror)

I’ve written about my hatred for the bluetooth takeover going on around the world. Honestly, when I see people with bluetooth headsets, I want to call them mean names in the street and tell them that while it may seem like it’s the year 2020 and we should all wear devices that can shoot lasers ...

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January 9, 2009 · 0 comments

If you can’t grow a real one like a big boy…

Where was this woman when I was growing up? Any day now, I SHOULD be able to grow real facial hair. Until then, i’ll continue to use “wow are you really THAT sensitive?” shaving cream and take 400 hours to shave three hairs on my face. Someday…a boy can dream… Link Below = Genius (thank ...

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January 8, 2009 · 4 comments

Don’t Stop Believing: An Ode to the Mixtape

“The making of a great compilation tape, like breaking up, is hard to do. It takes ages longer than it might seem. You gotta kick it off with a killer to grab attention. Then you gotta take it up a notch. But you don’t want to blow your wad. So then you gotta cool it ...

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