So Lesley and Jeff (Lesley being my best friend from growing up, Jeff being “that guy she married who actually turned out to be rad”) have a dog named Dexter. Dexter, at the ripe age of ONE, is basically the equivalent of a 86 year old man with asthma and a horrible gas problem. It can be awkward, but he’s lovable. And yeah, I’m posting about a dog. I fucking hate myself too.
These pictures are in no way doctored. And if you doctored pictures of a dog’s dick…well that’s like Mickey Rourke twelve years from now levels of creepy.
I don’t think any stereotype can compete with this thing. I mean, it must be exhausting to carry that thing around. Also, that is him ASLEEP and rocking that. Honestly. Lesley. Jeff. Get that guy laid.
Do you think he talks shit on walks? Goes into dog locker rooms and looks at poodles and goes, “Yeah. That’s real, fellas. Take a good look.” I mean. Good God.
(I am sorry for what you are about to see. But I can’t keep this to myself)

Oh. My. God.










{ 9 comments… read them below or add one }
Holy balls, Drew. Well, holy…yeah. Wow. I don’t know what’s worse – taking pictures or posting them on your blog.
My eyes can not un-see that.
You’ll be getting the bill from my therapist.
I am so proud of my dog. He really does like to show that thing off. He’s single if anyone is interested.
By the way, you realize they call these things “red rockets” right Rocket Shoes?
God.
Just call me big poppa…
It looks like when you microwave a corndog and the breading falls off the top.
Ohmygod I laughed at that analogy for a full two and a half minutes. Thank you.
Dex is too cute. He seems very proud. I have a boxer named dexter and he has a very mini version that I nicknamed the pink lady. Congratulations.